Link: So, how long will you live?

A fun little life expectancy calculator. I guess I need to cut back on coffee (and a lot of other things) if I want to see any of that retirement savings...

The most I can choose for tea is "Daily"? Where's "Hourly"?

Peter (82.5)

Your calculated health span is 87.9 years.

I have a funeral to start planning....

Hehe, I think it told me I should be dead already.

Your calculated health span is 87.9 years.

Hey, we're twins! Or at least until I forget to double-check a climbing knot someday..

I can expect to live until Error Occurred While Processing Request:

Error Diagnostic Information

An error occurred while evaluating the expression:

NewAge = #healthscore_e# + #healthscore_d# + #healthscore_c# + #healthscore_b# + #healthscore_a#

Error near line 1, column 7.

Cannot convert to number.

Idiots.

89.4. I'm obviously living right.

pca

70.6

Ouch. Even I was better than that. 76 or so.

I think some of it may have to do with my no seat belt issues...

66.4, I need to eat less and see a doctor apparently (haven't seen a doctor in 15 years as I'm never ill).

Holy crap! 56.1 years!!! I guess I can cut back on those 401K contributions!

Gotta quit smoking and eating junk food I guess... The fact my father died at 62 of emphysema should be a clue for me... DUH!

70.6 for me too. hmmm, sports? OK, more geocaching...

71. I knew I wouldn't live long enough to pay off my house.

89! Woot!

Now I need to barricade myself in my house for the next 53 years to avoid being hit by a bus.

Wait, I also need to trim the nearby trees to avoid limbs killing me in my sleep! But then I might fall from the tree and die!

Ok, so I'll hire a company to trim the trees for me and avoid the side of the house on which they are working. But wait, lightning may strike the phone lines when I call them, so I need to wait for the local thunderstorms to pass...

But then the storms themselves may be enough to bring down said limbs! Oh man, this is too stressful, now I need to take the survey again with my new (higher) stress level...

Your calculated health span is 86.8 years.

Phew! My Dad died at 59, and his dad at 59, and my Mom's dad at 59... I'm a little skeptical of getting past that point, but this definitely sets a lofty goal!

Well, it looks as if hanging round you guys seems to have helped (in spite of a nasty divorce) - 84.8. What am I doing right? I would have thought I was on target for a grisly death....

53.7 years. You mean the pack and a half a day, 4 hours sleep, and steady diet of coffee and coke isn't good for me?

87.9 here, despite the fact that I smoke. Wow.

89! Woot!

Of course, you understand that those last 3 years are *really* going to suck, right?

Now I need to barricade myself in my house for the next 53 years to avoid being hit by a bus.

Oh, don't sweat the bus and go out and have a pizza. This is all a bell-curve exercise. You wouldn't want to be the *one* "89" guy who locked himself in, missed that wicked pissah pizza, then died of a heart attack, would you?

Wait, I also need to trim the nearby trees to avoid limbs killing me in my sleep! But then I might fall from the tree and die!

*Now* you're thinking!

Ok, so I'll hire a company to trim the trees for me and avoid the side of the house on which they are working. But wait, lightning may strike the phone lines when I call them, so I need to wait for the local thunderstorms to pass..

But then the storms themselves may be enough to bring down said limbs! Oh man, this is too stressful, now I need to take the survey again with my new (higher) stress level...

Down to 86, I think!

Me? Just 25 more years of this mortal coil bullshit. I wonder what the pizza is like in Heaven?

Your calculated health span is 89.2 years

Jeez. I don't think I want to live that long. Kill me as soon as someone else needs to wipe my ass.

77.4

79.6

-Zeke

Kill me as soon as someone else needs to wipe my ass.

Yeah, taking a human life is wrong but there's a point beyond which it ain't a human life. If my body outlives my mind yet people are still keeping me alive then they're just using me as a mausoleum to myself, and an expensive and unpicturesque one at that. Shoot me and plant a tree already.

Peter

74.3

Looks like I'm a gonner, chaps! I think I got penalised for not visiting the doctor often enough. Have these guys heard of the NHS?

74.3 [...] I think I got penalised for not visiting the doctor often enough

I don't think that's it -- I treat my doctor on a strictly don't-call-me-I'll-call-you basis (in fact, I think as far as they know my address is still my university address from 1990) but still scored well into the 80s.

As an aside, it only occurred to me after a conversation with some Americans about the Queen Mother that the expression "to have had a good innings" only makes any sense at all in cricket-playing countries, where 80, 90 or 100 really is a good innings. It makes no sense at all to a follower of baseball...

Peter

93.2 - including my copious alcohol consumption. If there was a section in there for "what percentage of the time is your car sliding sideways" I might have come off a bit worse

Then again, maybe coffee isn't such a bad thing. I mean, if this can happen while making tea... I wonder how many years were deducted from that guy's life at that moment...

Well, in baseball, we don't use the word "innings" as a singular. One is just an inning. So that helps to at least indicate foreignness.