Decode this slang

Posted by: DWallach

Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 08:47

My loser cousin from New York, a Jewish kid with occasional pretensions to use neighborhood slang, wrote this in a recent e-mail:

oh yeah you might have to put me plus one if!!!! lets just keep it at if. you know how women are by now

Now, I'm not exactly a regular watcher of Yo! MTV Raps or anything like that, but I can usually decode most slang. This left me dumbfounded. If it helps, the context of the message was my forthcoming wedding and his first ever visit to Houston. Anyone have the slightest clue what he's talking about?
Posted by: loren

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 08:50

He means you might have to count him and a guest as coming... probably a lady friend, but it's a big if, because, you should know how women are at your age, so don't count on it.

The plus one thing is usually club slang... like if you're on the guest list, it's your name "plus one".

When i was riding the bus part way to work here in SF a few months back, the bus was always packed with kids going to school. I too was completely dumbfounded by the slang. I SERIOUSLY could not understand half of what they were saying, and i consider myself to be somewhat in touch with youth culture... i'm 25 for gods sake, i shouldn't be feeling that old that fast!
Posted by: robricc

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 08:52

I'd say it means that he will be coming to the wedding with a girl if she doesn't dump him by then.

Or, the if could mean if he doesn't find her in bed with his best friend by then.
Posted by: boxer

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 09:00

Hell, I must be getting young again in my dotage, I understood that straight away!
Posted by: lectric

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 09:03

It actually reads somewhat OK if you just use correct punctuation and grammar, which this new AIM generation doesn't know how to do.

Oh yeah, you might have to put me, plus one if! Lets just keep it as an if. You know how women are by now.
Posted by: DWallach

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 09:32

Or, the if could mean if he doesn't find her in bed with his best friend by then.

Or if he finds out she stole his weed.

It all makes sense now. I parsed the sentence as if "plus one if" were an adjective modifying "me", rather than "myself plus possibly another". Yeesh. I feel like I should respond in Cab Calloway jive or something.
Posted by: genixia

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 09:53

Full of typos. It should have been;

O yeah U might haf 2 put me + 1 if! les jus keep @ if. U no how o+ r by now
Posted by: Dignan

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 10:27

It actually reads somewhat OK if you just use correct punctuation and grammar, which this new AIM generation doesn't know how to do.

Oh yeah, you might have to put me, plus one if! Lets just keep it as an if. You know how women are by now.
I would say that no amount of punctuation could make that sentence grammatically correct, as the slang its self precludes the sentence from being so.
Posted by: tfabris

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 10:46

Full of typos. It should have been;
LOL
Posted by: CrackersMcCheese

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 11:05

Yeah, just totally confuse him with your response...

Man, you is butter side smooth to da bone! Ah'll slide yo bitches bro! God damn!
Posted by: lectric

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 11:53

True enough. I just hate reading anything any 10-18 year old trypes into a computer. I cn nvr undstd nething they sa. It's not like it saves them any real time.

Then again, I thought this was cool:

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht
oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist
and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae.The rset can be a total mses and you
can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm.Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not
raed ervey lteter by istlef, butthe wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh
Posted by: JeffS

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 12:24

That is really cool! I've never seen that before.
Posted by: CrackersMcCheese

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 14:07

Or just use this Jive converter!

http://ccwf.cc.utexas.edu/~eclectic/toys/jive.html
Posted by: Anonymous

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 14:12

jus


jus? that should be "juz". the letter s is out of style. Also, capital letters just slow you down. brb. g2g. ttyl
Posted by: Ezekiel

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 15:58

"Cut me some slack Jack! Chump doan want da help, chump doan git da help."

-Zeke
Posted by: tracerbullet

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 19:43

|)0n'7 |=0R637 4|30|_|7 7|-|3 "|,337" (0nV3R73R: http://developer.mechanicmatt.com/Leet.php?action=e
Posted by: trs24

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 22:48

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy
That is really cool. It's azamnig how esay taht ralley is to udenrtsnad!

- trs
Posted by: ricin

Re: Decode this slang - 23/09/2003 23:09

http://www.languagehat.com/archives/000840.php
Particularly interesting are the the post by guitchus on September 21, 2003 06:06 PM, and this forum thread.

http://www.snopes.com/language/apocryph/cambridge.asp
Posted by: frog51

Re: Decode this slang - 24/09/2003 01:46

I'm sure I saw this connected with the Cyrillic Projector story giving an example of why it becomes very difficult decrypting codes in foreign languages if there are spelling mistakes, whereas in your own language a lot can be extrapolated or assumed from our recognition of words.

edit - hmm, url syntax changed?
Posted by: boxer

Re: Decode this slang - 24/09/2003 01:56

Man, you is butter side smooth to da bone! Ah'll slide yo bitches bro! God damn!

Funniest damn post in a long time, the monitor copped for a whole mouthful of tea and I've only just stopped choking!