For your amusement - USB cables for the audiophile

http://www.positive-feedback.com/Issue40/usb.htm

http://www.locus-design.com/index.php/cynosure-usb-cable

Ah yes, before I got thrown off the *Computer Audiophile* site, those cables were highly regarded. They supposedly provide a dramatic improvement in sound.

But the same guys think wav files sound better than flac, and that transferring a file over the internet changes the sound (except if they are protected by *uncompressed* zip), and that the power supply you use on your ripping computer affects the sound of even bit-perfect Cd rips... I think they are into crystals and crop circles too...

Ha, reminds me of Bitt joking (I think) about someone preferring Seagate HD's because they brought out the colour in their JPEGs.

As far as analogue systems are concerned, I'm sure there are plenty of things that can be done to improve the sound quality of a device. But with digital audio, it's either on or it's off. Yes, things like jitter can affect quality, but I'd regard that as a fault.

I've never had a face to face discussion these audiophile types, but I can't help thinking I'd either be laughing my arse off or wanting to punch them in the face.

While I'm sure it's sad for his family that the bloke that makes those cables has died, it doesn't detract from the fact he was a snake oil salesman.

Buy my audiophile cables instead. They're only $2999 for 4 foot cables with a 60 day return period and only a 15% restocking fee. When returning the cables I also don't care what condition they're in and I'll refund 100% of the original shipping costs. Oh, they'll dramatically improve the sound of any source. Play a CD and you'll swear you were listening to an SACD. SACD sounds like live music.

Pay an extra 50% for the golden sleeve option and I guarantee that any source you play, including from previously digitized cassette tape or 8-track will sound like a live recording session at Abbey Road.

Or you can opt for the acoustimatch option. Send in a photograph of your listening room and your wife or girlfriend (daughter if she's over 18) and I'll custom-tune the cables so it sounds like the music is being played live in your specific room.

For an additional $100 you get more cowbell.

It is comforting reading this thread. So, it has not happened to me only to meet these audiphile aliens!



For an number of reasons, I ended up being part of a conversation with these sort of people two or three times, recently.
Some of them were claiming that the color of the walls of the room would affect how sound wave reflect and, therefore, sound quality. As if this wasn't enough, they would call a white wall "neutral", and a red wall "emitting", the first being better than the latter in acoustic terms, in their view.
When, after that, they continued recommending >>digital<< subwoofer cables (meaning: amp-sub) over analog ones, I was not that surprised after all.

I managed to keep myself silent all times. But, I admit surprise at their arguments helped my polite silence.

Edit:

... and, for some reason, I just find this paragraph funny beyond compare:

<< "...decided to insert an audiophile quality FireWire cable (The Locus Design Herald) into the data recovery chain; between the 17" MacBook Pro and the LaCie RAID 1 drive, and much to my surprise, it made a huge difference. I heard depth and detail that had never come out of my digital music server no matter how expensive the DAC all with pinpoint imaging, tons of air and space around the instruments and a rich, lush, tube like sound with ample bass and sparkling treble..." "...So to those who say that the data recovery cables don't matter, I say the moon is made of cream cheese..." >>

Thank you, guys, you made my day...

Wow, so I shouldn't waste any money on acoustic treatments for my home theater that are absorption-based (insulation, including bass traps). I should just re-paint.

Maybe if I painted stripes on the walls I could direct the sound to specific areas...

Stripes? Maybe. I suppose that would also depend on the cream cheese brand the moon is made of.

Nice find, gbeer! Goes great with:

Wattgate 381 Rh 20a Rhodium Plated Audio Grade Outlet

Antelope Audio Isochrone 10M Rubidium Atomic Clock

"My ones and zeroes sounds like ONES and ZEROES, motherf---er!"

I suppose the audio-focus of those web sites explains why they don't have any images.

My favorite is definitely the power-wire and outlet nuts. I've never actually read what any of them has to say when someone mentions the fact that neither the wiring in the dwelling nor the municipality from the power company is made with anything other than the cheapest copper the manufacturers could source at the time.

We have this discussion from time to time, but my favorite remains the $485 volume knob. Not volume controller. Literally just the knob.

There's a store in my hometown dedicated entirely to this type of person. If you're ever in McLean, VA, I highly recommend a trip to Deja Vu Audio.

The area is known for being a pretty wealthy one, so there's plenty of folks who can indulge in this type of hobby. Every once and a while there's a story in a local paper about these people who put their external power supplies in sandboxes, call electricians to put their fridge on another circuit, and buy tiny 6" high stands that hold their cables off the floor with fishing line.

I just like looking around the store at all the vacuum tube amps.

Phased array paint?

Should be very expensive. Special 5axis shaker needed to mix it properly.

That might work, but don't paint the stripes in straight lines. That would induce a linear harshness to the sound. You should curve the stripes, and increment the radii of the curves in a Fibonacci sequence.

tanstaafl.

See, you think you're being facetious, but someone's going to wander in here, see that, think "yeah, that makes sense", and before you know it, this shit'll be all over the audiophile sites. Presumably with mention of the golden ratio thrown in as well.

I purposefully installed bamboo flooring in my listening room, covered with a plush acoustically neutral carpet. The floor used to be oak, but I like my music, like my wine, unoaked.

I disagree... if you have a hardwood flooring (like oak, if you don't have the resources of Carnegie Hall), you'll get a better timbre!

Only if you have a cork underlayment. And it must be solid cork, none of that ground-up "technical cork" crap. If you use that, you might as well be using flat-sawn or hickory flooring. Philistines.

No no. You need Audiophiles Cork. $3,500 per square cm.

Any flooring, not recycled from a great concert hall, is simply inferior.

The vibrations from decades of great music, imbues the wood with a responsiveness that enlivens the room.

I love this thread.

Here's another argument I actually heard and forgot to mention:
analog cables have a preferred direction. Precisely, electrons flow "better" in one direction than in another. Did you know that?

But, a counter-argument was actually brought to the table, according to which you should swap cables connectors periodically or cables will spoil, over time, and eelctron flow will be negatively affected. And therefore audio quality.

Did I know that? I used to be an electron conductor before I was homeless.



That was one of the services I performed, when it was too late to simply conduct/control the electrons. Kind of expensive too, what with the special shoes and gloves. But the maintenance service was a much better option and with only one visit every 5.673 months, I could prevent that from happening and you wouldn't have to swap cables around.

I don't know if I still have my electron conductor's wand though. It might be here somewhere in this shopping cart under the tin foil hat..

I always liked the Monster/Coat Hanger deathmatch:



-jk

If you want audiophile reviews without the BS*, have a look at The Audio Critic.

* Although, where's the fun in that?

A few good audiophile cartoons here.

For a second I thought you were talking about The HiFi Critic - pretty much the opposite.

See This thread and This thread...

Honestly, if either of those threads weren't insanely dull and colorless, I'd think they were just having a laugh like us in this thread.

In reference to the second thread, I guess none of them has ever heard of a hex editor or a simple binary compare program?

I should sell these guys magic q-tips - it will improve their musical enjoyment 100 fold regardless of what hi-fi equipment is being used. A truly portable sonic-bliss solution.

But not just any q-tips. The cheap ones leave bits of cotton behind that modify the acoustics in your ear, reducing the free flow and breathing of the instruments. But with my new microfiber q-tips using carbon fiber sticks, you can clean your ears efficiently and effectively.

But those programs only show differences of *data* bits. *Audio* bits are different!

I suppose their bits are created with a No.2 pencil in multiple shades between ON and OFF.

No, no, no! You have to realize that there are subtle timing differences between the bits. Those differences don't matter for data, but they do of course matter for audio. And anyway, don't give me that "bits are just bits and bits are perfectly error-free" nonsense. I have seen with my own eyes how even word documents get corrupted when transferred from a PC to a Mac.

(yes - actual argument I have come across more than once)

OMG, those two threads are scary...

I have to mention this thing:
http://www.dnaudio.it/playback-Chisiamo.htm
All in Italian unfortunately, but, to sum up, a € 18,000 ($24,000 circa) CD player that is never called such in the entire website. They prefer "DAC which includes High Quality Optic Reader".