I've got an Antex 25 watt iron with a superfine tip, I can pretty much solder anything with it, I did my button lights with it and I'm confident I could do memory upgrade with it too now. I doubt you'd need temp control and the Antex is cheap and reliable, I've had it for nearly 5 years and it gets pretty regular use.

As for a DMM, a Fluke or an AVO would be my choice. Mindyou I've been using the same cheapo Maplin Fluke-ripoff for 4 or 5 years too.