So sorry I haven't responded yet! My wife and I were just in SF this October and loved it. We mostly did the standard touristy stuff, though, so I'm not sure if I have much to add to anything you might be doing already, and we didn't see any musical sites there (I know plenty of grunge sites in Seattle, but that's pretty much it for my musical geography).

Here's my stream of consciousness summary of what I can suggest from my experiences (though it's certainly not as valuable as info from someone who's lived there would be):

We loved the Ferry building and ate at a nice restaurant there for brunch called Boulettes Larder (they make an amazing pastry called a canelé).

We did the whole Alcatraz thing, which was actually a lot of fun for a touristy thing. It's pretty tough to get tickets, but it might be a little easier this time of year.

I'd say stay away from Fisherman's Warf (except for maybe the sea lions). I really hated how touristy it was. Same for Ghirardelli Square. Union Square too, for that matter.

We also liked Coit Tower, which has great views of the city and the bay.

City Lights Bookstore was neat, but we were only able to jump in and out.

As far as dining goes, we ate at:

Paladar Cafe Cubano (because my wife knows I love Cuban sandwiches)
Farallon (courtesy of my mom, otherwise we wouldn't have been able to afford it it was delicious )
Plant Cafe (near the Ferry building)
Cafe de la Presse (great French cafe outside our hotel)


Oops, sorry, have to wrap it up. Time for dinner out with the wife (celebrating the 14th on the 12th instead). If I think of anything else I'll try to let you know, but it looks like you won't have many more days of pure tourism left...