Conveniently, dictionaries exist to define words
Hot:
1 having a high degree of heat or a high temperature:
it was hot inside the hall | basking under a hot sun.• feeling or producing an uncomfortable sensation of heat:
she felt hot and her throat was parched.Warm:
1 of or at a fairly or comfortably high temperature:
a warm September evening (as defined by the dictionary built in to OS X/iOS, which is the New Oxford American dictionary)
From my experiences, I've never had any of the iPads or iPhones reach what I'd consider uncomfortable to hold. The iPhone 4S is probably the warmest when I've had it in the car charging, while running GPS, bluetooth audio, cellular data and the screen. Even letting my new iPad sit charging while also running Infinity Blade II, it's not getting warmer then the phone. Neither to me would fall under the defined definition of hot.
I am pretty much of the opinion that the news stories out there covering it are indeed sensationalism. Even the Consumer Reports article did mention this:
During our tests, I held the new iPad in my hands. When it was at its hottest, it felt very warm but not especially uncomfortable if held for a brief period.
Buried down in the story though, below many sensationalistic claims.
I guess these stories are the modern equivalent of local news running "killer escalator" stories, to attract more viewers to see the ads that run during the breaks.