I've gotta get some advice on buying a mattress.

I've chosen to live very simply over the last few years, with few regrets. One of the regrets I do have is that I wake up every morning with back pain largely because of the cheap foam mattress I sleep on. It's basically like a piece of 6" yellow foam on top of wood slats. I realize that even having that makes me quite wealthy and fortunate by local standards, but living with daily discomfort still stinks.

So I'll be headed back to the US in a little over a year for a furlough and with that move will come a relocation allowance. I'll need to purchase a mattress and won't have an extravagant budget, but I'm realizing increasingly that a decent mattress is a good investment. One more note: I'm 6' 3" (190 cm) and weight about 220 lbs (100 kg or 15.7 stone). I've had problems with every mattress I've ever owned gradually sagging and forming a valley where I sleep (even when I rotate and flip it.) Sometimes that doesn't happen until I've owned it for a year or more, so I'm hoping to not be disappointed again. Rarely happens for my wife's side, or not nearly as badly, so there's definitely a weight where many mattresses just throw in the towel and gives up. I'd like some recommendations on:

1. Mattresses that you've specifically found to be good for dealing with back soreness (for me it's in the lumbar region).

2. Mattresses that have held up well over time for people who are big.

I'm hoping to get some real value and satisfaction out of this mattress, since I'm likely not going to be able to afford another one for quite some time. I realize that a year in advance is a long time to start shopping in advance, but if I can get some kind of idea of what I want, then I can start checking out prices and budgeting appropriately.

Thanks so much!

Well, the exact opposite of that would be a waterbed. Depending on what sort of back pain you have and the cause, the waterbed might help you. My back did hurt in the mornings with a waterbed (not badly, the pain went away very shortly upon getting up) and I slept on one for 20 years, but didn't realize that there was a better alternative until my wife came into my life with her Tempurpedic queen-size mattress on a hospital-style powered adjustable bed frame. However... these mattresses are not inexpensive, running well into multiple thousands of dollars, and they are enormously heavy and awkward (200-300 pounds?) and probably difficult to ship to Belize. There are memory-foam alternatives to the Tempurpedic brand for substantially less money, but I know nothing about them. After sleeping on the Tempurpedic for, lets see now, 2012 minus 2005, that's about seven years now, I would go without shoes before I went without the Tempurpedic.

If there is a way to try out a waterbed, you might see if it might suit your needs.

tanstaafl.

My old mattress had this problem. It was some major brand name and it just eventually sagged in the middle. My wife hated it, so when we moved into our new house, we ditched it and went to Macy's, which has a remarkably large mattress selection. (Plus, if you time it right, they will sometimes have significant sales.)

We ended up dropping something like $4K on a king size Macy's-brand mattress that claims it need not be flipped or rotated. It's "firm", which we both prefer, yet has a layer of memory foam on top so it's not like you're sleeping on a board. Four years in, we're still completely happy with it. My wife, in particular, used to complain of lower back pain with the old mattress and she loves the new one.

For size comparison, I'm 5'11" and 195 pounds, so in the same ballpark as you in terms of the damage I do to a mattress.

Thanks Doug. A Tempurpedic is not off the table. I'll be in the US for at least a year and when I move I'll likely be able to take it with me or put it in storage. So no sagging on the Tempurpedic after at least 7 years now?

Thanks Dan. I'll have to see if I can figure out who Macy's uses for their mattresses. They're likely just a re-brand of a major manufacturer.

A lot of big-name mattress makers have extra "firm" models -- definitely what you should be looking into.

Cheers

The reason I won't buy a foam mattress is the insulation they provide. You wind up cooking in your own reflected body heat.

This is what I'm afraid of, and why I posted my own thread about mattresses a ways back. But what I really need is a way to test one of those mattresses out first. It seems crazy to me to buy a mattress - especially a type I've never slept on before - without trying it for even one night, when you're going to be stuck with it for a third of your day for the next 10-20 years! It's the most absurd shopping experience I can think of!

It really makes me appreciate that racket the hotels have going where they'll sell you a mattress like the one you slept on during your stay. I'm sure you're paying a heck of a markup, but at least you know what it's going to feel like.

I tried calling around to see if any hotels in my area had Tempurpedic or even just foam mattresses, and none of them did (though that didn't surprise me).

I'm just having a really difficult time with this whole "buying the most important furniture in your home without properly testing it out first."

I know this is a weird question, but if you took a ruler to that indentation in your bed (while nobody was on it), how deep would you say the sag is?

Looking at the Tempurpedic website, it looks like they warranty it for 20 years, provided the bed rests on their own foundation and frame. Remember that you HAVE to get a new foundation for a Tempurpedic, and can't use your old box springs. But they'll warranty it for anything over .75" of sag, so maybe that would be appealing to you. I have no idea if this warranty would hold up in Belize, but at least they're standing behind their product.

I would guess my own bed has more than that much sag on my side. I have a little less hight and a little more weight than you, so I'm very concerned about mattress sag as well

Yeah, I'm talking about 2-3 inches of sag, and more when I'm in the bed.

Yikes! That IS pretty bad. I wonder if part of that is because of the wood slats? I remember having those for my bed when I was a kid, and they didn't seem to provide good support...

That depends entirely on the slats, no sag on our slatted bed.

After almost exactly 7 years of daily use, it looks like I have maybe .25" of sag. It's not a big depression in the middle of the mattress, but a slight low spot that runs across the width of the bed about where my hips would rest.

The Tempurpedic has a thick, ventilated mattress cover that, for me at least, alleviates this problem. I've never had a problem with overheating.

tanstaafl.

It's not the slats. They're nearly 1 inch thick tropical hardwood. I can stand on them easily with little or no flex. The problem is that the mattress is just piece of yellow foam. However, I had the same problem with my last two mattresses in the US, which were inner spring mattresses with a box spring and metal frame. They were probably sagging at least 1.5 in" on my side and 3/4" on my wife's side with a hump in the middle. Then after flipping them, they sagged on both sides.

Tell me about it. It's regularly well over 80 degrees at night and no A/C. Sometimes I wake up soaked in my own sweat on wet sheets. ewww. and with 90% humidity, I'm lucky if they dry completely before the next night.

My wife loves the foam covers, but even here in Scotland I end up cooked, so we are trying to find a mattress with foam only on one side, but still the same height all the way across.

No joy so far!

It's been quite hot here the last few days (humidity over 80%) but we haven't had any heat related issues with our ventilated foam mattress, never have.

While I don't have chronic back pain, I do have it occasionally and took that into account when buying my current mattress (which I got like 7 or 8 years ago). I went with the Select Comfort bed. The ability to change the firmness makes all the difference in how my back feels the next morning, sometimes I need firmer support than others.

I'm 6'3" and 205lbs, and the mattress has held up very well. I did spend quite a bit on it (either top of the line or second from when I got it), but I feel that it was well worth it.

My parents have one of those 'sleep number' beds and it does seem quite good. Being basically an air mattress, so it can't sag, but it doesn't feel any different than any other mattress. My dad spends about 20 hours a day on it with no sign of wear. I think it's around 10 years old.

I was in a hotel once with one of those things. I found it uncomfortable at every setting.

I figure mattresses are very personal. There's no such thing as a "best" mattress for everybody.

Can you just use a foam cover and only put it on half?

I believe they are fitted with elastic in the ends.

Not the one we have it's just a pad. I have been thinking about cutting it in half because something my wife does when she gets in the bed causes the pad to be pulled over to her side. Then I end up half on the pad and half off.

+1 for Tempur.

We've had one for 2 years, and I recommend it warmly.
In Rome it can get hot in summer (up to 40 Celsius degrees), but I never had issue with temperature, which supposedly depends on the fact that the memory foam they use is ventilated.

Depending on your weight, they will recommend specific models and related thickness. I weight 75/80 Kg, but I am positive they had different (thicker) models for people of 100Kg and above.

Vaguely related question:

I've always had polyester fiber-filled pillows. After a few years, they get lumpy, but they don't cause me any allergy issues and they provide enough support, no matter whether I'm on my side, back, or front.

I recently stayed at a friend's place, and he had a Tempurpedic foam pillow of some sort (latex?) that was surprisingly comfortable. It had one side thicker than the other, presumably to give you more options for how you want to use it. Poking around, I see a wide diversity of different pillow types out there (memory foam vs. latex, never mind odder things like pillows filled with buckwheat hulls -- basically finer-quality beanbags). Has anybody here investigated the diversity of pillow types? We're ready to get some new pillows.

We got Tempur memory foam pillows as well. They are ergonomically shaped with a thinner section in the middle, and edges of two different thickness, theoretically to best accomodate your head and neck. The idea is that if you sleep on one side you will want the thicker edge under your neck, while if you sleep on your back, you'll want the less thick edge under your neck.

I have to say they work pretty well with me, and I'd recommend those. Also, I'd recommend memory foam over latex (which I had before), as it tends to be significantly more comfortable. Also, still on paper, Tempur memory foam is ventilated (they claim it is made with some sort of "open" nanotubes) and in addition should not cause allergies. That was the case for me, for what it's worth, but I never had allergies in general.
When I made some research (most of it was made by my gf, actually), Tempur seemed to be considered the best in the market. I really don't know enough tech details to support that, but after two years I am quite happy with their products.

Interestingly, we recently bought a memory foam mattress from Ikea for another house, which is what I am using in these days, and albeit the memory foam layer is only 7cm - and of course it costs a fraction of Tempur - it is not bad at all. Definitely not as comfortable as Tempur (one can easily tell the difference), but way better than other mattresses I've tried.

I'm a big fan of feather pillows. (I don't know if you mention allergies because you're allergic to feathers or not.) Amazon has a private label called "Pinzon" that makes good ones for a good price.

Yeah, feather pillows are all kinds of bad news for my allergies.

Tempur is a petroleum product and Latex is a natural product - in case that matters to anyone. Tempur and all similar foam products will off-gas for a while - some people are sensitive to this even after years of use.

I think the heat issue you see a lot of complaints about with Tempur and similar products can be managed through different coverings. Even on a traditional fabric-covered sprung mattresses, different sheets can breath completely differently and affect your comfort level.

My favorite so far has been a memory foam layer on top of a multi-layered latex base. Latex will not break down and lose shape like the cheaper foams used on some "memory foam" products. Even on a real "Tempurpedic" product of say 12", not the entire 12" is made from Tempur.

I needed to update this thread because we finally got a new mattress.

I'll sum up like this: my wife wanted pillowtop, now neither of us is happy.

*sigh*

So now I'm posting this mattress on Craigslist for about $300 less than we bought it about a month ago, and we'll try to figure out what to get. Even my wife, who is always cold, finds herself burning up from the pillowtop spring mattress. We got a very nice one (Stearns and Foster), but it's way to warm for us.

I know that mattresses are subjective, but I would have thought that there would be at least some consensus on what the coolest mattress is, or the coolest combination of mattress/pad/sheets would be.

Does anyone have any new thoughts on this subject? I could really use some help. I haven't had a good night's sleep in weeks...

For what it's worth, my wife and I went to Macy's, years ago, and tried every damn mattress in the store. We settled on a Macy's brand firm mattress. It's got some memory foam on top, but it's not a pillow top. You didn't say whether you got a firm or soft mattress, but that may be part of your problem. If you sink down, then you've got more of your surface area against the mattress, and that means more thermal problems.

That's true, but the problem is more with the fact that it's a pillowtop. You're almost always going to sink into something marketed as a pillowtop, whether it's also listed as firm or soft. Our mattress, for example, is listed as the firmer end of the spectrum, but the top is still a pillow that creates a divot after you've slept on it for a while.

I really hate this mattress...

What's really annoying to me, as I do more mattress research, is that there seems to be completely differing opinions on whether memory foam mattresses create heat, and whether they create more/less heat than traditional mattresses. I'm seeing mattresses with rave reviews and people saying they get no additional heat, with other people saying the same mattress makes them feel like they're a pizza in an oven.

I recently bought a new mattress, and almost lost my mind in the process with all the various options out there. I found this site to be immensely helpful.

http://www.themattressunderground.com/mattress-forum.html

I ended up purchasing an all latex mattress from a local manufacturer and ended up saving a lot of money in the end. I couldn't get over the "sinking" feeling that a memory foam mattress had. I also liked the idea of an "all natural" product and supporting a local manufacturer. The guy who runs the site seems to have contacts in the industry around the country, so if some one already hasn't asked you can post and he'll hopefully provide you a few local spots to start at.

I've been reading about latex mattresses, but for some odd reason they seem to be the least common type sold in stores! From what I was reading, they're all-natural, breath better, and have faster bounce-back. From what I can tell, they're better in every way!

Thanks for the link, I'll check that out...

Eventually, you get used to it. Trust me on this one.

I'd like to, but here's the thing: everything I hate about this mattress is exactly what I hated about our old mattress, except exaggerated.

The old mattress (and I mean old - about 20 years old) had definite divots on both sides of the bed, which means I was sort of sunken into it, making my shoulders very uncomfortable if I slept on my back or stomach. It also made me warmer because I was surrounded by more material.

This new mattress - because it's a pillowtop - makes me far hotter and even more sunk in.

So no, I'm certain I can only despise this mattress more as time goes on.

I should add that all of this was exactly what I was worried about when it came to purchasing a pillowtop mattress.

I have avoided anything like the phrase "I told you so." I want to stay married

I just meant your body will adjust to sleeping in the heat. After no A/C for three and a quarter years, I can manage to fall asleep and sleep soundly in a pool of my own sweat. I know it's gross, but it's amazing how the human body can adjust.

Heh, I'm glad you were able to, but that's just not going to be the case for everyone. I hate being hot at all times, not just sleeping, so I would never dream of moving to Belize in the first place :-)

Heat aside, the comfort is also a big problem, and that is something I shouldn't get used to as it could be bad for me.

Petteri, thanks for the link again! It's going to take a deep dive into that site, but it's easily the most helpful page I've seen on the subject of mattress buying! Thanks again...

No problem, just don't go too deep! Eventually you'll need to give up the research and go test some mattresses. Hopefully you get some good info and leads from there. Keep us posted!

A few years ago I went through the same process as you. Back then, the memory foam (Tempur) mattresses were also pushed a lot onto the customers (and still are from what I can tell), but I hated them. Every time I lay onto one of those in the store, I felt like I was "dead weight" (I don't know how to describe it differently). I hated how my body sank into it, and I hated how it took a tremendous amount of effort to get out of one of those beds because the mattress would not bounce even the slightest bit. No way in hell I was going to buy one of those!

In the end we also settled for a latex mattress, because it breathes. It's soft, bouncy and very supportive for the back. My wife is a back patient and sleeps like a baby in this bed. I must say this mattress is easy twice the thickness a normal mattress is, but it's just sooooo good, I really don't care.

The brand I bought is Lattoflex, but I don't think they sell outside Europe. The site is also not in English, only Dutch and French, but with the help of Google translate it might still give you some ideas. I'm pretty sure a comparable product exists in America.

This is my matrress : click. I love this thing! I must say, it's also helped a lot by the pattented Winx bottom. In this movie clip, you can see how Winx works. In this movie clip, you can easily see how thick the mattress really is.

Thanks for that testimonial!

So you don't get too warm on that mattress? Before the Lattoflex, did you get warm on other mattresses?

The thickness isn't too much of a concern, but I won't be able to use a platform system like that Winx thing. Our bed is just a wooden-slat platform bed, so we can only put a mattress on top of it. Hopefully that won't cause too many problems for my search.

I NEVER get warm on this mattress. No even in the midst of Summer. I DO remember 'overheating' the (very) few times I've ever slept on memory foam (at a friends house) and I found it to be very uncomfortable.

The Winx system isn't a necessity, but it helps a lot if you've got back problems (which my wife has). Apart from that, it's mostly the mattress which does the work. It's a very 'breathing' fabric and I never even sweat in my bed. (at least not up to a level that I notice it or it's uncomfortable)

Can anyone explain why latex mattresses aren't more common? From everything I've read, they're superior to other types of mattresses in pretty much every way. Is it just personal preference and the marketing of brands like Tempurpedic that keep latex mattresses from being better known?

I can't speak to the mattresses, but I can speak to pillows. I've bought myself a variety of weird pillows, in the the search for that magic something or other. I bought an all-latex pillow, and not only didn't like the feel of it, but the smell never really went away. I later bought a pricey Tempurpedic memory foam pillow and it's what I'm still using.

As they say, you mileage may vary.

It's funny how nuts you guys get with mattresses. I get it... it's an important life decision for some, especially when you have to take another person's comfort into account.

I'll just toss in my recommendation. The primary reason I bought this Sleep Innovations mattress was the price. After sleeping on it for over a year now, I have to say I'm thoroughly pleased.

I didn't put a lot of thought into the purchase. I just needed a new mattress because my previous traditional $300 mattress was showing its age. I also wanted to try-out memory foam.

I've never once been overly hot on this mattress. Generally, I prefer to be chilly than warm. Even in the summer, I have never been hot on this thing. However, I do run the a/c constantly.

It's relatively cheap and it's available with Prime shipping. I'm sure Amazon won't mind if you take it for a 30-day test drive. Just be aware that once you pierce the vacuum sealed plastic it's shipped in, it will never fit back in the original box again.

It's not that I don't believe you, but I can guarantee you that my mattress doesn't smell like anything. Perhaps there are different sorts/production processes?

Allergies.

I have been sleeping on a Tempurpedic for the past 8 years, and would never consider anything else.

But... YMMV.

tanstaafl.

Heh, yeah, I'm really finicky when it comes to my comfort I also despise being too warm, especially when sleeping. I'm still waiting for someone to invent the magical "Always-stays-cool" pillow.


I will definitely take a look at that one, Rob. Amazon actually has several highly-reviewed mattresses, funny enough, including an [url=http://www.amazon.com/Ultimate-Dreams-Latex-Mattress-Queen/dp/B0051AQXZK]all-latex one[/quote]. I'm paying attention to return policies, and it's funny to me that they're better at Amazon than they are at the brick and mortar store where I bought our crappy pillowtop that I'll be saddled with forever...


Another problem is that I like firm mattresses and my wife, I think, likes softer ones. Which do you prefer and does that memory foam model you bought suit you?


Haha, yeah, I've seen the videos of that opening process. It's pretty hilarious how much it expands. It reminds me of those capsules I used to get as a kid that you drop in water and the shell dissolves to release a big sponge in various shapes

Costco has some well-reviewed mattresses and has a great return policy, so I might check them out. But if I want latex, I might try that one I linked to on Amazon. Apparently, after you place your order the manufacturer gets in touch with you via email to ask what level of "firmness" you want, then they make the mattress to your specifications! They range from 1 (super firm) to 10 (soft) in 1-step and sometimes .5-step increments. Pretty nice customization for an Amazon seller.

Must be. I've seen wildly conflicting reports on the smell issue for every single mattress I've looked at. It's subjective, of course, and might also depend on how good a person's sense of smell is, but that doesn't account for how differing the opinions are. Some people say there's no smell at all (or one that dissipates after an hour or two), and others say that they're blasted with toxic fumes, and no matter how long they open the windows, run ceiling fans, or burn candles, nothing will get rid of it. And we're talking about the same mattress here...


Yeah, that could be. I wonder, would that still apply if all these layers of fabric are between the person and the latex? Would you still get an allergic reaction?


Thanks for the input! The one major issue with Tempurpedic is that they're a good deal more expensive than the alternatives. I wouldn't be surprised if you get what you pay for, but if the difference between 80% happy with my mattress and 90% happy is $1000, I'll take 80% Right now I'm at 0-10%

I prefer firm mattresses. I would say that the memory foam mattress I have is exactly what I expect from a "firm" mattress.

I didn't do a whole lot of research on the subject, but it does seem to be more common for memory foam products to be labeled as firm rather than soft. I bought a memory foam pillow recently, and it's pretty damn firm. Definitely the firmest pillow I've ever encountered. I wasn't happy sleeping on it the first couple of nights, but my neck is feeling noticeably better in the mornings. I'm going to try to adjust to the firmness.