Hah, figured it out.

The issue is that everyone said "Oh it's in ~/Library" without explaining where the fuck that is. I'm supposed to glean from magic that "~/" means the root of the user profile folder rather than the root of the hard disk.

I was putting it in the wrong folder.

Funny thing is, the first place I looked for a "Lbrary" folder had been the user folder and I didn't see one. I had to do swizzlestick-G and type in the ~/Library to find it.