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So which are you, gbeer? 
Me, I'm the first time seller who received the payment and shipped the item. Heck, I even though I specified buyer pays shipping, I made up the difference between rock bottom USPS shipping and FEDEX ground just to have the tracking and insurance. I thought that I provided insurance for the ebay selling price ~$150, but the receipt shows only the std $100.
When I first heard no arrival, My first thought was "glad it was FEDEX, somebody had to sign". Was dismayed when checking the tracking it showed sig. not reqd.
Me, I'm not a lawyer either, but there's both legal and moral liability.
What I think is a even handed way to chase this problem is this.
- Get FEDEX to provide whatever info they can. Hopefully this will find it.
- Make a claim with FEDEX. That won't likely help. I'll bet they will claim their liability ended when the box was dropped and they have the records to show it was dropped.
- Get the seller to file a stolen property report.
- Beyond that it would seem to be a matter of conscience.
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Glenn