Well, it's not even that, is it? It's poor people who happen to be trading off the same Happy Mondays lyrics as you. Surely if you make a fuss, you're demonstrating that melons and the twisting thereof comprise a valuable property, and there's a risk that Shaun Ryder and Bez will sweep in and pick up the lot...

I suggest you just go and rotate a grapefruit instead. Or oscillate an apricot. (But don't crush a grape -- that one's taken.)

Peter