So what's the difference between straights and straits?

Well, "dire straits" is an old saying. It means "to be in danger" or in some other kind of difficult situation.

I don't know where the origin of the old phrase comes from, but the word "dire" means "serious" or "extreme", and "straits" usually means a narrow passage (usually water) between two impassable barriers (such as continents or mountains or whatever). Hmm, now that I think about it, it doesn't make much sense. But then, old sayings rarely make sense. I'm sure someone will come along and correct me on this, because now I'm not so sure about my definition.

On the other hand "straight" means, well, straight. A straight line. In fact, in that context, you wouldn't even say "straights"- it's a non-word.

Except that in recent years, the word "straight" is now slang for "heterosexual" when referring to the difference between gay and straight. So in that context, you could say "straights" when referring to more than one straight person.

So, in essence, by calling the band "Dire Straights", you're saying they're extremely serious heterosexuals. Which might be true, I don't know, I've never met them.

PS: "straights" can also refer to normal people among abnormal people. For instance, sane persons in the company of insane persons. Bill Murray says a great line in Ghostbusters 2. There's a scene where his fellow ghostbusters show up at a fancy restaurant covered in slime and acting crazy, and Bill tells them "You're scaring the straights!"

That concludes the English lesson for today.

___________
Tony Fabris