Buy my audiophile cables instead. They're only $2999 for 4 foot cables with a 60 day return period and only a 15% restocking fee. When returning the cables I also don't care what condition they're in and I'll refund 100% of the original shipping costs. Oh, they'll dramatically improve the sound of any source. Play a CD and you'll swear you were listening to an SACD. SACD sounds like live music.

Pay an extra 50% for the golden sleeve option and I guarantee that any source you play, including from previously digitized cassette tape or 8-track will sound like a live recording session at Abbey Road.

Or you can opt for the acoustimatch option. Send in a photograph of your listening room and your wife or girlfriend (daughter if she's over 18) and I'll custom-tune the cables so it sounds like the music is being played live in your specific room.

For an additional $100 you get more cowbell.