Also, something I whipped up today. Source "to the tune of" should become obvious very quickly:








(Told from the point of view of a project manager at
a certain little company in San Rafael, CA, sometime
in the mid-1990's...)




"My vision was too big for its time," he said to me,
"there were too many limits technologically.
I've got this burning need to fix my trilogy.
There must be... fifty ways to change my movie."

I said, "I don't think that's a good idea, dude.
Furthermore, all of your loyal fans will think they're getting screwed.
But I'll concede your point, 'cause clearly no one disagrees with *you*,
there must be... fifty ways to change your movie.
Fifty ways to change your movie."


(Chorus:)

Ya just clean up the mattes, Pat
Make a new song, John
Then add some more bots, Dot
Just do as I say

Speeder gets fixed, Dix
I think we need a new sound mix!
Add a launch bay, Kay
Just do it my way



Ooo, step on his tail, Gail
Max Rebo's new band, Stan
Add Blue to Artoo, Stu
Don't ask yourself why

Add a new slave, Dave
The planets need a new shockwave!
More ships in the sky, Sly
Kiss the old films goodbye


I said, "those changes are too goofy and arcane.
And I must say... showing Greedo shooting first is just insane."
He said, "You're wrong about that... Han can't seem inhumane,
at least not nowadays."

And then he ordered me to start the work that night.
I suppose it could be worse, he could remake them all outright.
And though it's too bad... ILM can't fix the fact that he can't *write*,
I guess there's... fifty ways to change the movie.
Fifty ways to change the movie.


(Chorus)